“To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you may be the world” Dr. Seuss
Alan, please don’t touch that. Keep
away…”
“Alan, no! You might hurt yourself, and then you’ll cry…”
“It’s not a toy, Alan — it’s a knife for chopping vegetables.”
These are the words of Sonia, the
mother of a two-year-old boy, as she prepares dinner in the kitchen. Her son,
Alan, is curious — reaching out toward the shiny knife in her hand.
Sonia knows she must act fast. The
simplest solution? Hand him something harmless that looks like a knife,
or quickly distract him with another object.
And it works. Because Alan is just
two years old — and at this stage, his mother still holds full control over his
world, including how he thinks, reacts, and shifts focus.
But what happens when Alan turns
four?
What if he’s six — and the same situation repeats itself?
This is where the dynamics of
parenting begin to shift. The same child. The same situation. But now, parenting
gravity begins to change.
"Just as a
doctor can offer the best treatment only when the condition is clearly
understood, parents too can guide and support their child more effectively when
they have a clear picture of the child's developmental stage — emotionally,
physically, and cognitively."
Stages of Child Development and
Shifting the Parenting Approach.
There’s a difference of opinion
among experts regarding the number of stages in a child’s development — some
define four stages, others five or six. While the number of stages may vary,
what remains consistent are the key developmental changes that occur at
certain ages or age ranges. And this is especially important from a parenting
perspective.
Children undergo significant
physical, emotional, cognitive, and language-related changes from birth through
adolescence. These shifts — often called developmental milestones —
serve as a guide for parents to recognize when and how their parenting
approach needs to adapt.
1. Newborn (0–3
months)
Newborns can turn their heads,
respond to sound, focus on close objects, and cry to signal needs. By three
months, many begin to smile at familiar faces.
Your
Role as a Parent:
- Prioritize health and hygiene for both baby and
caregiver.
- Follow pediatric guidance over casual advice from others.
- Ensure emotional bonding through skin contact,
eye contact, and gentle speech.
- Understand that this stage involves round-the-clock
care and personal sacrifice.
Parent Tip: It's okay to feel overwhelmed — newborn care is intense but
temporary. Rest when you can and seek support without guilt.
2. Infant (3–12
months)
Infants become more interactive —
recognizing faces, sitting, crawling, and imitating sounds or gestures. Their
physical and social skills develop rapidly.
Your
Role as a Parent:
- Maintain safe surroundings as mobility
increases.
- Encourage development with playful interaction and
sensory toys.
- Talk, sing, and narrate your actions — this
builds language exposure.
- Continue responsive feeding and sleeping routines.
Parent Tip: Stay present and engaged. Simple play and consistent
attention go further than fancy gadgets.
3. Toddler (1–3
years)
Toddlers learn to walk, run, climb,
speak short sentences, and follow simple instructions. Their independence grows.
Children can wave bye-bye, hold a pencil or crayons.
Your
Role as a Parent:
- Provide safe space for exploration with close
supervision.
- Set clear and consistent rules with gentle
discipline.
- Support nutritional needs and promote
independent feeding.
- Begin teaching about emotions and acceptable
behavior.
Parent Tip: Choose patience over power struggles. Toddlers are learning
by pushing — not provoking.
4.
Preschool (3–5 years)
Preschoolers develop stronger motor
skills, language fluency, emotional awareness, and social habits. They begin
imitating adult behavior and asking questions non-stop.
Your Role as a Parent:
- Model good behavior
— children copy what they see.
- Establish daily routines that promote stability
and structure.
- Encourage curiosity and creativity through
stories and hands-on play.
- Teach empathy by naming emotions and discussing
how others feel.
- Give simple responsibilities like tidying toys
or helping set the table.
- Be aware that your actions and habits leave a long-lasting
impression at this stage.
Parent Tip: At this stage, you are your child’s greatest teacher — even
when you’re not trying to be.
Parents can mold a child’s thinking and behavior in subtle ways, so
model the kind of person you hope they’ll become.
5. School Age (6–18 years)
Children in this phase develop independence,
deeper thinking, emotional complexity, and social identity. Friendships,
learning, and self-awareness become central.
Your
Role as a Parent:
- Be emotionally available while respecting privacy and space.
- Offer non-judgmental guidance and allow open
conversations.
- Teach real-life skills: time management,
financial basics, cooking, self-care.
- Provide age-appropriate decision-making freedom
with natural consequences.
- Stay involved in school and social life without
being intrusive.
- Recognize that even as independence grows, your values
and reactions still shape their choices.
Parent Tip: Your role shifts from protector to coach. Be someone they
can turn to — not someone they must avoid.
Final Reflection
Parenting isn't a static role — it's
a dynamic journey that shifts with every stage of a child's life. By understanding
development and adjusting your approach, you build a relationship
based on trust, guidance, and mutual growth.
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